I don’t know what I want. There, I said it. I’m a college junior and I’m confused, which is scary because juniors are supposed to have it together by now, right? Well, after being at war with my thoughts and contemplating a lot, I found out the answer is yes and no.

 

In high school, I had my life planned out. I knew what I wanted and I was about to go achieve it. Now, I’m not sure. I’m starting to question my choices and if I made the right ones when it comes to my major. How is it possible to be so in love with something and then end up having conflicting thoughts about it? I’ve learned that it’s O.K. to just be confused. It’s O.K. to question things, because life is about being happy and if something is bothering you then talk it out and figure out what makes your heart happy.

I started off freshman year of college ready to become a doctor. I took one marketing class and my perspective changed. Sure, marketing has been an interest in mine when I was younger, too, but being a doctor always seemed to outweigh it.

Now, I’m not sure if I made the right decision. Do I follow something I used to love or do I follow something that has completely taken me by surprise and am now starting to like?

College is about making these hard decisions about what you want and what makes you happy. I want to become a doctor, but what makes me happy is marketing. It’s a difficult choice to make and I’m still debating on what to do. However, I do know one thing for sure, and that is that if I do marketing instead I will always regret not being a doctor.

After looking at my reasons and going over the countless lists I made I think I figured something out that will give me the best of both worlds: I think I’ll do both.

My problem is that I’m passionate about two things that are on completely different ends of the spectrum. I can’t pick one without looking back at the other and thinking if I made the right choice. Since I’m already on track to becoming a doctor I think I’m going to complete my program and then go back to school and get my marketing degree. I can definitely incorporate both degrees together as I’ve seen others do it. So am I ready for this challenge? Am I ready to go back to school after I get a Doctorate degree? Am I ready for the financial debt? Am I ready to work during the day and go to school during the night? Right now, yes. Later on? I’m not so sure, but if my passion continues to stay with me then I have to do whatever I can to achieve it and make myself happy.

So it’s O.K. to be unsure, and it’s O.K. to second guess your decisions because it allows you to figure out if you are doing the right thing or not. Uncertainty is a scary place, but the best part is when you’ve thought every little thing through you come up with a decision that ends up changing your life. How it changes you, that’s for you and time to tell. The thing about uncertainty is that you’re never sure where it’s going to lead you in life.

 

 

What do you think?

Sound off on your college struggles below. What’s your major? What are your post-grad plans?

 Author: wolves5

More Every College Girl

6 Comments

  1.  wolves5 says:

    Ya, I think that’s definitely a big issue as well. You have to be absolutely certain you want to do something and then a little more. For me, when I was in highschool I wanted to do medical, but even in highschool, something related to business was always at the back of my mind. It opened now in college and now I’m stuck between two passions. However, a job at Wall Street is really an incredible opportunity and while you may dread it now, remember you picked it for a reason. There had to be something in it that made you love finance and your success has led you down to a great path that anyone would love to have. I hope you find your happiness in your new job, even if it is in the smallest things. But if you don’t, it’s never too late to be who you could have been. Time is endless and you can do whatever you want, but it starts with you! Good Luck!

  2. Split Split says:

    I can definitely relate. I am graduating in two months, two weeks, and six days (but who’s counting). I had my future planned from the time I was six. I was getting into medical school and becoming a doctor. I worked all of those years to achieve this dream, but when I finally arrived at college I started having second thoughts. I started doubting myself as to whether I was cut out to be in the program and decided to drop and just pursue a degree in finance. Now here I am, about to graduate with an AMAZING Wall Street job…that I hate. I wish I stuck to my dream, or I wish I can just apply to med school or a veterinary school and live out my dreams, but now that I have this “amazing” job I am stuck. My parents keep telling me how lucky I am, how successful I will be and I am just absolutely miserable. Guess money can’t buy happiness after all, but I learned a little too late.

  3.  courtneylovexo says:

    I know exactly what you’re going through. It’s really tough – I want to be a doctor too. Thank God I’m not the only one. I’m terrified of making the wrong decision, especially since the road to med school is a long and hard one. But I guess we all make mistakes, right? Thank you so much for your story. :)

  4. christpucil christpucil says:

    I know how you feel because I have almost same story like you. I studied in two universities and two different majors, english and chinese language. I still confused about my future because I didn’t interest in chinese, but I have to continue my study for my future and for my parent, even I still confuse about it. Your story makes me think about my passion. Every person has different passion and it will be very happy if we follow our passion. For now, I have to face the major that I didn’t like, but in the other hand, I also follow my passion in english major. So, sometimes we have to take another way that people can’t imagine to get our dream. After graduate in bachelor degree, I really want to continue to master degree to get my passion.
    Thank you for share your story. College life is confusing but someday we will miss our college moments :)

  5.  chelseab33 says:

    I can relate so much to your story, even to the marketing part. I constantly battle with myself trying to decide what I want for my future. Marketing is one class that has changed my mind. I too have always enjoyed other things, but the Marketing and Advertising classes that I am currently taking have changed my perspectives. Your story makes me feel less alone and I appreciate knowing that someone else is struggling with the decision of what to do with the rest of their life. Everyone seems like they have it all figured out, but it is nice to know that someone else is just as confused as I am, I really appreciated your story! Thank You!

    •  wolves5 says:

      Thanks soo much! It really is a good feeling knowing that you aren’t the only one feelings such things! I hope you are able to figure out what makes you happy and able to go achieve it :)

Leave a Comment