Been casually dating the same guy for awhile and want to take things to the next level? Not sure what you want but want to figure things out together? The DTR (define the relationship) talk can be fun and exciting, but also scary. So, here are some suggestions to help thing go smoothly:

Be Honest

If you’re not sure where you want to take things, say so. Your guy will appreciate that you care enough to communicate and if they don’t, they aren’t worth it. Be honest to both your feeling and your mind. If things aren’t playing out the same way in both, grab a friend and try to talk out why your feelings and mind are conflicting, so when you’re talking with your man, you can express yourself honestly.

Be Open

Maybe the idea of just dating someone for fun, or as a make-out buddy seems strange to you. Being open to new ideas is a great way to feel happy and comfortable within a relationship. Try something for a bit, if you you’re not happy, speak up.

Be Objective

Rejection is hurtful no matter who it comes from. But, if you try to look at it positively, then you can actually learn from such experiences. So, if someone doesn’t like your personality, find someone who does like you for who you are rather than making yourself into someone else.

Be Smart

Work on your relationship no matter what stage it’s at. Sometimes unexpected feelings, both good and bad, arise. When this happens, redefine your relationship in your own mind, then talk it out.

Be Healthy

Everyone deserves to be in a healthy relationship. When you have been in both a healthy relationship and one that is bad for you, you will completely understand the difference. If you’re not getting back what you give into a relationship, talk it out. If nothing changes after this, it may be best to reconsider.

What Do You Think?

Do you girls have anymore suggestions of how to make the DTR talk go smoothly?


  1. avatar Deborrah Cooper says:

    Be QUIET!

    No need to tell every thought in your head or every sexual experience you’ve ever had in the past with the new man in your life. Even if he asks, avoid telling him! Men cannot handle hearing about what you did physically with some other guy and believe me, it will come back to haunt you in the end. There should be a limit to you “being honest” when it involves things you’ve done with other people. Remember, that person didn’t give you permission to “be honest” about them – only yourself.

  2. avatar Sunaina says:

    I remember that I was very shy and I didn’t communicate because of that. My bf thought assumed that I was not interested in him and hooked up with another girl. That broke my heart! Luckily everything ended up ok and I learnt: communication is the key!!

  3. avatar Annie says:

    That is also a very important part of a relationship. Thanks for your imput.

  4. avatar Tiffany says:

    You must also learn to GIVE just as much as you TAKE. If you’re boyfriend is always going out of his way for you, don’t take it for granted. Show him that you appreciate it all and he’ll keep it coming! That also works the other way. If you are constantly doing special things for him, take notice if he isn’t putting forth the effort to do the same for you!

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