I don’t know what I want. There, I said it. I’m a college junior and I’m confused, which is scary because juniors are supposed to have it together by now, right? Well, after being at war with my thoughts and contemplating a lot, I found out the answer is yes and no.
In high school, I had my life planned out. I knew what I wanted and I was about to go achieve it. Now, I’m not sure. I’m starting to question my choices and if I made the right ones when it comes to my major. How is it possible to be so in love with something and then end up having conflicting thoughts about it? I’ve learned that it’s O.K. to just be confused. It’s O.K. to question things, because life is about being happy and if something is bothering you then talk it out and figure out what makes your heart happy.
I started off freshman year of college ready to become a doctor. I took one marketing class and my perspective changed. Sure, marketing has been an interest in mine when I was younger, too, but being a doctor always seemed to outweigh it.
Now, I’m not sure if I made the right decision. Do I follow something I used to love or do I follow something that has completely taken me by surprise and am now starting to like?
College is about making these hard decisions about what you want and what makes you happy. I want to become a doctor, but what makes me happy is marketing. It’s a difficult choice to make and I’m still debating on what to do. However, I do know one thing for sure, and that is that if I do marketing instead I will always regret not being a doctor.
After looking at my reasons and going over the countless lists I made I think I figured something out that will give me the best of both worlds: I think I’ll do both.
My problem is that I’m passionate about two things that are on completely different ends of the spectrum. I can’t pick one without looking back at the other and thinking if I made the right choice. Since I’m already on track to becoming a doctor I think I’m going to complete my program and then go back to school and get my marketing degree. I can definitely incorporate both degrees together as I’ve seen others do it. So am I ready for this challenge? Am I ready to go back to school after I get a Doctorate degree? Am I ready for the financial debt? Am I ready to work during the day and go to school during the night? Right now, yes. Later on? I’m not so sure, but if my passion continues to stay with me then I have to do whatever I can to achieve it and make myself happy.
So it’s O.K. to be unsure, and it’s O.K. to second guess your decisions because it allows you to figure out if you are doing the right thing or not. Uncertainty is a scary place, but the best part is when you’ve thought every little thing through you come up with a decision that ends up changing your life. How it changes you, that’s for you and time to tell. The thing about uncertainty is that you’re never sure where it’s going to lead you in life.
What do you think?
Sound off on your college struggles below. What’s your major? What are your post-grad plans?